Hey guys.

Here is a song I wrote late last year. which have been reworking a little. This is an acoustic version although we do it at church with a full band and violin. Let me know your thoughts.

Blessings.

Josh

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Wow, gorgeous.  I don't think I'd even want to hear a band version, the acoustic version fits the song perfectly. 

Do you have a CCLI number for this one yet?

thanks for your feedback. ccli # is on its way. registered late yesterday and expecting number today. will post ccli number here when ready.

Very, very, nice.  I'm with Charles - I think acoustic is just right.  Good for listening, and paced right for congregational singing.

The only complaint I have is that when music is posted here as a file, the lyrics are not shown unless one posts them somewhere.  If you are asking for feedback, then a sharing of the lyrics is important (in my opinion).  (And really I just had to beat you up a little for something because somebody has to on this give and get song feedback).  ;-)

Very nice!  I could feel a part of the song when you say, 'hold me'.  Nice melody, nice lift in the chorus.  It doesn't soar like I might expect, but that doesn't mean that it should.  The lyric bounces along rather nicely.  I could hear a full band version going on and the violin...but I do love the acoustic version.  The song is very effective this way.

Beautiful.

One production nitpick is that the flatpick on the guitar is louder than the guitar sometimes.  This is a distraction.  I don't mean to pick (pun not intended!) on anyone, but a simple choking up on the pick will solve the issue.

Please post the lyric.  Feedback isn't complete without it.

Thanks for the feedback. Very much appreciated! i have uploaded the chord/lyric chart for you as mentioned.

Steve Cass said:

Very nice!  I could feel a part of the song when you say, 'hold me'.  Nice melody, nice lift in the chorus.  It doesn't soar like I might expect, but that doesn't mean that it should.  The lyric bounces along rather nicely.  I could hear a full band version going on and the violin...but I do love the acoustic version.  The song is very effective this way.

Beautiful.

One production nitpick is that the flatpick on the guitar is louder than the guitar sometimes.  This is a distraction.  I don't mean to pick (pun not intended!) on anyone, but a simple choking up on the pick will solve the issue.

Please post the lyric.  Feedback isn't complete without it.

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Josh--

This is a really lovely, lovely lyric that matches the warmth of the melody.  I like how the song is structured, too. You go back to two bridges and then the first verse again rather than two choruses.  I think that's an interesting choice when I would normally want to go back to the hook.  That is something you might consider if you haven't.  But it really doesn't matter because going back to that wonderful bridge works, too.

I take a look at the use of the imagery of the heart.  The verse give wonderful imagery, but I can't help but wonder why you stuck with the heart imagery into the chorus and then the bridge as well.  There is no wrong, for sure!  But I'm curious as to your thought process, and why you wouldn't want to bring in other imagery?

Again, no rules, 'cause it al works.

Great job.

Steve

Joshua Halls said:

Thanks for the feedback. Very much appreciated! i have uploaded the chord/lyric chart for you as mentioned.

Steve Cass said:

Very nice!  I could feel a part of the song when you say, 'hold me'.  Nice melody, nice lift in the chorus.  It doesn't soar like I might expect, but that doesn't mean that it should.  The lyric bounces along rather nicely.  I could hear a full band version going on and the violin...but I do love the acoustic version.  The song is very effective this way.

Beautiful.

One production nitpick is that the flatpick on the guitar is louder than the guitar sometimes.  This is a distraction.  I don't mean to pick (pun not intended!) on anyone, but a simple choking up on the pick will solve the issue.

Please post the lyric.  Feedback isn't complete without it.

Thanks for your feedback guys. FYI the CCLI number for this song is 7048534 Take Me Away. 

Cheers.

Hey, a few of the chords on your chart didn't get transposed from Bb down to A...

We listened to this with the band this evening and it is now totally stuck in my head.  What a great song.

We also have three girls in the youth group who are high-school serious about dance, and I emailed the youth director (one of the girls is her daughter) to see if they'd be interested in working up an interpretive dance to the song to do in the service sometime.  Will send you a video if it happens :-)

That would be amazing. Thanks so much! please do!

Hey Charles. Just curious.... did you end up doing this song at your church? 

Not yet.  Sorta waiting to find out if the youth group was going to make a dance out of it, but I don't think that's going to happen, so we'll probably work it up with the band, but it'll be a few weeks before its first appearance.  I will certainly let you know and post an .mp3 unless we have a trainwreck first time out :-)

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