Intentional or Natural Community

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Permalink Reply by Wayne Pau on February 25, 2010 at 5:13am

Wow. What a tough question. I think building community is one of those tough things like facilitating "inspired worship". You can do things to 'invite' it, but it's definitely not formulaic. (This is where I'm glad God judges us by our intentions and not the results.) I don't think there is a "If you build it, they will come..."

For me, I've been blessed by a very tight-knit worship team built over the last year or so. We definitely bonded and have a consistency that is lacking in some of the other teams. I have no recipe, but my goal as the team leader was to love them first. I invited them over to my house and cooked them a meal. I lent them instruments and equipment to start-off with before they bought their own. I spent a lot of time with them individually, nurturing them musically and challenging them theologically. I recorded multi-track demos for them to practice with at home and spent time each practice catching up with their lives and praying with them. I try to sit them down and rebuke and challenge them when I feel it's necessary, but more often than naught I try to extend grace to them.

They have seemed to return that in kind. They try really hard and stick up for each other. The skill level improvement has been drastic. The team has a very high expectation of themselves, and I've never really had to police them about tardiness or absenteeism. They have all been driven to become better worship musicians and leaders, some even investing in new equipment and taking professional lessons.

I guess if I had liken it to anything else it would be like children. You love them unconditionally, invest in them and hope they reciprocate. People, even teens seem very wise. They seem to be able to tell when you do something out of genuine love, and when you're trying to force a situation. I'm hoping that I'm somehow leading by example.

That's my experience at least. Maybe other people have a more direct approach. Not sure it would work on a larger scale. I'd love to see what other people do.

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Permalink Reply by Junjie on March 2, 2010 at 3:52am

I really respect the work you put in with your team, Wayne! :) And I would curious also about how to do things like that on a larger scale. That would be a challenge!

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Permalink Reply by Dave Hartwell on February 25, 2010 at 6:08am

You have to do it all. Don't just "hope" that it will happen -- be intentional. But know that it will only truly happen when it becomes natural.
- We've had "group dinners",
- We're all going to go to the opening of "Letters to God" on April 9th (plug!)
- I sometimes bring in a training video
- Do stuff together when possible; lunch after church is Good!
- Pray for your team!
- ...

There is a thing about group dynamics. Understanding that teams form via stages - "Forming, Storming, Norming, and Performing". For instance, when I've seen various phases of this, I've pointed out that it's a healthy sign that people start to have some level of interpersonal conflict. That shows that enough trust has formed that our facad, or "mask"s are coming off, and enough trust is there that people can start to be "real" to each other. The proper Christian response is to be humble, inwardly, and that journey takes us to the "norming" phase where the team learns to work together and eventually to the "performing" stage. (I also found that it's important to remind them of the Christian principles of going straight to your Brother if you have an offense and not discussing this with others, as that becomes destructive gossip. ...)

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Permalink Reply by Ariel Salazar on February 25, 2010 at 8:47am

Jennifer,

In my experience it has usually been intentional before it became natural. I follow the 3 P's- Pray, Pay and Play together. Pray actually stands for the focus of what we do on a Kingdom basis. Our ultimate reason for coming together is to engage in our call to worship Him. We make every effort to re-affirm the fact that each team member is an essential part of what the church is doing to further the cause of Christ. This becomes their reason or purpose for being a part of the team.

We pay together when we pool our talents together in an effort to develop our musical chemistry. Each person is sacrificing his or her time and energy to come together and fulfill the mission. Rehearsal time is the place where many of these relationships bloom and flourish. I also use other activities like song writing sessions, jam sessions, and leadership meetings to help deepen relationships among team members.

Then there is Play-time! Typically, we use the months that have 5 weeks to schedule our play dates. This is when we schedule activities outside of church and do things like bowling, softball, fishing, concerts, or just go out and eat together. We also plan special activities around different holidays throughout the year. This is a great time to include the families of the team who also sacrifice and enable us to fulfill our mission throughout the year.

I believe that because we are intentional in building community, it takes on a life of its own. It truly becomes the DNA of the worship ministry, and compels others in the congregation to want to engage. I hope this helps.

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Permalink Reply by Jennifer Bradshaw on February 25, 2010 at 11:25pm

I'm learning so much...

For us it was very much intentional. God brought us together and we worked to become great friends. Time has also helped. All but one of our 6 member team have been together for 5+ years. The last one to join us has been with us for nearly 3 years. At 33, I'm the youngest, but everyone else is 50-60.

We really enjoy spending time with each other. Our rehearsal time is something we look forward to each week. We have planning dinners, go to each other's musical events, get together to have fun. One of our favorite activities was getting together to play Rock Band. We've become really invested in each other's lives. Our drummer is having surgery on her foot and will be out for a while and while she's down, we're making dinners for her and her family.

I also thing that when we defined our roles, we worked better as a group. I'm the worship leader and head the planning for the service, but don't have a lot of musical experience - especially with instruments (I'm a singer). So, we decided that our bass player would be designated the band leader. He and his wife (the keyboardist) now pick all the music and arrange and lead rehearsal.

I realize truly how lucky our group is. I hope you can find ways to draw you all close together.

Blessings!

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Permalink Reply by Benjamin Luce on February 26, 2010 at 2:35pm

I'm with Ariel and Dave on this. It has to be both. Usually, though, like they said, you must be intentional to start.

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Permalink Reply by Jennifer Kerr on March 1, 2010 at 3:31am

We have a three-site church. Some musicians play at all three, some two, and some just one. It's been quite a challenge to have community across the three sites. There are so many people at such different levels of commitment.

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